I found myself in a similar situation when my daughter turned a year old. I was out of work/working from home for 5 years when my wife decided that she wanted to be home with our little girl. Having worked for a number of high-profile companies, she was making a very good salary when she decided enough was enough. Rather than simply telling her that switching places wasn't an option, we looked into ways to make it happen. What ultimately occurred was that she started her own business working from home, and I returned to an office job. My wife has worked her entire career in the marketing field, so she was able to start a business as a consultant, working on short-term projects that took her out of the home for only a few hours a week (we hired a regular babysitter to cover the time when my wife is out of the house.)

I don't know if something like this is a viable option for you and your wife, but I thought I'd offer it up as a possibility.

my wife has uttered this sentiment many times over the past year and a half. while i have no problems with the theory of switching the - main problem (as with other guys here) is that i can't jump back into the working world after 7yrs and make what she makes.

we've talked about how when my youngest goes to kindergarten in the fall we will switch but that will still be less $$ even if she works part-time.

but that's a long way off for you kev.
what i can suggest is (if affordable) take a class or get certified or something a few times a year som that when the time comes to jump back in, your resume won't be filled with blank space.

i'm actually interning next spring a few mornings at a possible place of employment (the 40 yr old intern! now that's a movie)
and seeking out taking some classes at the Center For Documentary Studies (part of Duke) in an effort to show prospective employers that i have done something besides
raise two kids, write songs, record a CD, build a treehouse, have a few short stories published... blah blah blah like we all already know parenting is a full-time job but nobody gets any "credit" for it.

then again maybe this is just a phase and will pass like teething or potty training!

my wife is a full time grad student. it's super tough for her to be away and tough for the kids sometimes too.

oh, yeah, and me.

can't offer much advice here, but i would encourage you guys to figure out a way for her to take as much time off as possible when the baby comes. those first months are really mommy time unless you're lactating.

-b

cool music for parents:
http://cdbaby.com/brianjoseph4

Randy,
You are very kind. Mommy guilt is a huge issue for AHDs. If we don't handle it well, we could find ourselves out of a job.

This is just a short follow-up to my last post thanking JPhilip for the advice. I took his advice to heart very much, and I made a note to take the time to tell my wife some of these things. So there we were sitting at the dinner table about three nights ago with my son next to us. Usually my son pays about the same amount of attention to each of us at dinner, but he was paying me an especially large percentage of his attention at this meal. My wife looks over at me and says, "He really loves you. You are doing such a great job." Seeing that we were having one of those special moments reserved for spouses, I looked at her and told her many of the things JPhilip posted above. My wife burst into tears of happiness and could only manage a "Thank you, honey. That means so much to me." through her sobbing. That advice is some powerful stuff, my friends.

- Randy

As noted, that was a spot-on post. I only hope everyone on this site reads it, and remembers it. Certainly doesn't hurt me to be reminded of the things I so easily forget.

Thanks!

Jim
Boulder, CO
Dad to Cole, Luke & Trev