...After-market minivan parts like giant tires, brush guards, and a kick-ass winch. Better yet, the Honda Odyssey would look more like THIS.
...Home Depot selling Pampers by the pallet.
...Ride-on indoor vacuums!
...Better yet, living room floor drains to accommodate the new Hoover "Mr. Pressure Washer" backpack model! Diamond plate coffee table optional.
...Glitter, Barbie shoes, and anything else smaller than about 1 inch would, by federal mandate, contain at least some metal, so we could collect them with those giant magnets they use to sweep up nails at construction sites. Better, yet, put that in my riding vac. And a cup holder.
...Stroller handles that are height-adjustable without the use of those bolt-on thingies.
...Diaper bags? F*ck no. Diaper utility belts, available in cammo or black leather.
...Propane-fired Diaper Genies for quick and easy incineration. Natural gas hook up optional. Oh, and a changing table with lots of steel drawers like those the chopper mechanics use on Discovery Channel.
...Parental leave laws so generous they'd make the Dutch weep.
Your turn.
Joined: 2007-01-03
Dad Points: 146