As Father’s Day quickly approaches the bookstore shelves quickly fill up with books on Dads. Mostly focusing the non-AHD types but heck we still have a lot of ground to cover. One book making its appearance this year is Teachable Moments and Essential Discussions: Twenty-Five Things a Father Should Do With His Son by Nicholas Stavola with Joseph Durso.

Let me begin by stating up front that I agree with all twenty-five things to do with our sons. Whether it be attending their births (check), taking son to work (everyday, check), or talking about respect for himself and others (check, as much as you can check that off with a four-year-old). The guide (at 69 pages it is harder to classify as a book) provides tips, support, and ideas for creating a lasting relationship with your son(s). It is obvious that both Stavola and Durso love their boys and model the new dad model that is growing in prevalence around the country. No more Ward Cleaver reading the paper while waiting for dinner, and dispensing advice from his easy chair. We are all to become active dads.

Now having athomedad.org review the book is like having the Pope review the Bible. I not only agree on the concepts of the book but, hopefully, all AHDs put these moments into practice. I would mention to Stavola and Durso that a large segment of the AHD population are not sports fans so the chapter on “Have a Common Rooting Interest” might need to be modified, but “Share a Hobby” can easily be expanded to cover any deficiency in sports fanaticism. (I myself am a huge sports fan and am raising a somewhat rabid Cubs fan.) In general, though, there are not many AHDs I would see needing this book. Unless you have been dragged kicking and screaming into the role, but then the book will not really help until you’ve resolved larger issues.

Also, sadly, many of the dads who would most benefit from the ideas shared by the authors may not even pick up this book. The old-fashioned “macho” dad may dismiss easily. Even if given to him by his wife, as a not-so-subtle hint. We probably know dads, either personally or through acquaintance, who seem to think that distance and discipline are solely the way to go. I find it hard to believe that Teachable Moments would break through that façade. Although it’s length does benefit it. No one can complain that they don’t have time to read it. I finished it on a long “L” ride to Chicago.

So who is this book for? I recommend mostly for the nervous new dad. The guy who fears the unknown of dad-dom and want a book to lay a path. The guy who sees his wife reading 4 dozen books on pregnancy, parenting, and pediatric health while wondering “shouldn’t I be reading SOMETHING?” This book nicely fits the bill.

One more note to add, from my wife, and something for the dads with daughters. All, or many, of these “Moments and Discussions” can easily be transferred to your relationship as well. Often Father’s Day become a holiday of dads and sons and we forget that although men can have a special bond that the relationship between fathers and daughters no longer needs to be drastically different.

Teachable Moments and Essential Discussions: Twenty-Five Things a Father Should Do With His Son by Nicholas A. Stavola with Joseph Durso. Published through www.lulu.com, 2009.