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Invitation to New Mothers Organization

Hogan
Posts: 409
 Joined: 2008-04-21
 Dad Points: 720

I’ve been invited to join a new organization named The Motherhood Consortium in Tarzana, California. Tarzana is north of Los Angeles in the San Fernando Valley. Of the current 40 plus members I will be the lone male.

Here is more information: The Motherhood Consortium …established to bring together those working with mothers and babies so that an open dialogue about the issues most challenging and relevant to their field can be discussed in a structured, professional manner. The Motherhood Consortium will be an inclusive community of individuals who provide care and nurturing for mothers and their babies either through education, enrichment or social/emotional support. Anyone offering professional services to mothers and their babies is encouraged to attend -- from Mommy & Me to preschool teachers to music or sign language educators, from lactation specialists to postpartum doulas and midwives, from physical therapists and speech therapists to parenting experts. Co-Leaders are Dr. Diana Lynn Barnes, Psy.D., M.F.T. and Cathy Doré, M.A., M.F.T.I. The group meets on a quarterly basis. I will attend my first meeting on September 18th. I'm scheduled to be a speaker in September 2010. Once again I will walk into another Lionesses Den! It will be interesting to see how receptive this group of moms will actually be once they've gotten a taste of me and how this project pans out. I’ll keep you posted.


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Submitted by Hogan on Tue, 09/01/2009 - 2:56pm.

chitownman
chitownman's picture
Posts: 223
 Joined: 2006-11-12
 Dad Points: 311
Hogan, Hope that it all goes

Hogan,

Hope that it all goes well for you my friend.  It is going to be an interesting experience to say the very least.  I look forward to hearing what happens as you attend the various meetings that they have.  See you here in about five weeks.

 

Robb


Tue, 09/01/2009 - 6:15pm

Hogan
Posts: 409
 Joined: 2008-04-21
 Dad Points: 720
Changed Mind

After further thought, I changed my mind and decided not to join the Consortium or speak to the group in 2010.

The co-director, Diana, who invited me asked why I had a change of heart.  Here is the reply I emailed to her:

Society doesn't need another mom's group that only addresses the needs of moms and babies as stated in the description of the Motherhood Consortium.  Did you ever discuss the idea of calling it the Parenthood Consortium and giving equal billing to the dads?   There is not one parenting magazine, organization, group or entity that I know of who provides equal space, time, energy and funding for the concerns and need of dads. 

I feel as though I've been invited for the wrong reasons.   

There is so much that women need to know about men as fathers.  Here is a one example on the lack of effort from women including my wife, Tina.

When Tina and I were pregnant, she expected and demanded that I read books on motherhood and parenthood (which were really books about a mother's perspective) and attend lamaze class-again 90% of the curriculum addressed moms and babies issues.  If I didn't she would get upset.  During that time Tina never offered to read or read a book on fatherhood.  And if I would have asked her to attend aclass on fatherhood she would not have done it.  It wasn't until 18 years later that she read her first book about fatherhood "The Modern Mom's Guide to Dads." If I hadn't written the book, she would never have read one.

My above experience has been confirmed by other moms and dads who have attended my workshops.  

In my workshops for dads, dads have told me that their voice is almost never heard and that if they do say something it either has no credibility or is taken the wrong way.

I feel it is time for me to take a stand and not accept any invitations to speak from any mom's group or organization until I see some changes made that insures dads issues will be addressed and given equal billing.

Thanks for asking.

Robb, thanks for your support, look forward to seeing you in Omaha. Counting the days.

Hogan

 


Fri, 09/04/2009 - 1:01pm

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