Deleted by author.
Deleted by author
Proud and Happy, Happy, Happy!!!!
Been at it for 19 years. No regrets. Started in Jan of 1991. Initial plan was for three years but I fell in love with being an at-home parent. Love every minute of being an at-home dad and not making money was not an issue for me. I was fine with my wife, Tina, not only being the primary breadwinner but also making more money than me. As far as I'm concerned, I feel blessed that I've had her support. I have a great gig. I'm 54. Boys are 21, 19 and 16. I plan on staying home until our youngest Matt graduates from high school.
Keep On Daddying
Parenting is Partnership
Who cares who makes the money? My wife and I never cared about that as long as we make enough to raise happy and healthy kids. We have 4, ages 7 to 1 and me being at home works for us. I have never cared that I don't contribute financially to the family because I believe marriage is a partnership. Both of us put in our best talents and we both get all the rewards that come out of it.
Al
Daddyshome, Inc. - The National At-Home Dad Network www.daddyshome.org
Welcome
Hi Arthur,
It is a rewarding and frustrating position to be in. My father in law and I don't get along as a result of my staying home. Little does he realize that his daughter makes more than he ever did and he made a lot.
You have to stay true to yourself and your marriage. I have been at this for 4 1/2 years. I am now starting to look seriously at getting a job. I just started writing about the life we live for Examiner.com. It doesn't pay anything to speak of, but it keeps me a little busy. I am starting to look around for another gig.
dave
Thanks for the positive comments ...
It's a relief to hear them from like minded men. I spent my whole life being conditioned to put job first, above all else. I managed to practice that, UNTIL my daughter was born. No one could have told me how much that event was going to change my priorities, as well as my life. I kept trying to strike a balance between work and time with my family, but I was fighting a lost battle. I can't even take credit for making a conscious decision to do the right thing. I just kept performing more and more poorly at work, and doing it miserable as hell. Something inside kept telling me, the most important thing I could do with my time on a daily basis, was drop my child off at school, and be there to pick her up in the afternoon, help her with her homework, build that tree swing she wanted, video tape that first bike ride without the training wheels, answer all of the "Why Daddy?' questions ... all of the things that I COULDN'T doing, as a full time worker...
It's a pleasant suprise to read so many stories, about so many different guys reaching the same conclusion I did. And the forum that listed the URL for the "Stay At Home Dad" rap song ...was hilarious ! :) LMAO ! :)
I'm thankful I found this site. Thanks again for the affirmations. My daughter is a spoiled, happy, healthy, well balanced child. I may have washed out on the career front for the time being, but I sure as hell enjoy being a father that is PRESENT on a daily basis! I look forward to reading more of your comments and tales of success...
Arthur Johnson
Same here ... rewards with frustration
The fact that we have been fortunate enough to learn how to live and work together, to build a safe, nurturing home for our child, free from the scourges that plague our society, without any help from either of our families, seems to be lost on my inlaws. My wife doesn't make an exorbitant amount of income, but well enough to more than meet our needs. More importantly, she ENJOYS the challenges that her career presents her, for the most part, as well as maintaining her own financial independence.
I have been suprised, reading through the different forums and threads, about how much I have in common with so many of these guys. I read one post from a man (his syntax led me to believe he's from across the big pond) about taking his kids to the park, and being shunned by the mothers that were there...been there, done that. My social circle is pretty much a big fat zero. I also read the threads in the Pro, Trade and DIY forum about so many of them having dozens and dozens of jobs...been there as well. Almost everyone I know, is either completely unemployed, or working 60+ hours a week, doing something they hate just for the paycheck. That is madness.
The only opinions I'd heard until I found this website, were those of the poor bastards I was working with. Stuck in their ruts, working their lives away on jobs that gave them absolutely NO satisfaction, sense of pride, or accomplishment. Most of them do it for the week to week paycheck existance they've created. Pay the motorcycle, boat, 4 wheeler, etc. payments. Take a week or two of vacation a year, and never spend any time with thier wives or children. That just didn't seem to add up to me. I thought maybe I was crazy. I suppose I may still be...? At least nowif I am, I have some company.
It's a great relief to read these posts from so many guys that share my perspective. Thank you for the welcome, and telling me about the similarities in our situations. I'm not crazy...I'm Not crazy ... I'm NOT crazy ...
Arthur Johnson
You Are NOT Crazy
Looks like you already have received some great feedback, but I will add my two cents. I have two daughters. Now 2.5 and 4 years. I would have laughed in anyone's face if they told me four years ago I would be a SAHD. We had just moved after having our first daughter, so my wife could begin her new job. She was making way more than me (I was in Sales if it matters). We realized quickly that it made no sense for me to work, since all it did was cost us a ton in childcare, and make our lives more stressful trying to keep up with the kids and the household stuff. I decided to give staying home a try part-time at first. It worked so well for both my wife and myself. We found we were both much happier, not to mention the kids are thrilled to have one of us home with them. Also I have learned a lot about fabric softeners... lol.
Congrats on your career choice! And don't ever let someone tell you being a SAHD is not a career.
Joined: 2009-11-02
Dad Points: 17