I have 4 kids and am experiencing my second round of this problem. All my kids are about 2 years apart. When my second was born, I had the same problem because my then 2 year old was used to having all my attention. Now, she couldn't. I needed her to learn to entertain herself for times when I had to feed the baby or change the baby or whatever. I read a book called 'Toddlerwise' and it suggested a technique to teach her to entertain herself. Put a blanket on the floor and put a bunch of books or her favorite toys on it. She has to stay on the blanket for a period of time and then she gets a reward (a sucker maybe?). Start out with 1 minute and work your way up to as long as you think she can handle it. It actually worked AND it helped for giving timeouts later; she knew how to sit still for a period of time. The other thing I did was watched PBS Kids while I fed the baby. This usually kept my older one entertained. And, this was the only time I allowed her to watch TV. Another, probably obvious suggestion, is to give her all your attention when the baby is napping. That way, she won't be quite as starved for it when the baby is awake.

Now, I am going through this whole process again with my son (#3). His two older sisters are now in school full-time (2nd grade and kindergarten). He has always had a permanent playmate (his sisters) and now suddenly has none - except me! His younger sister is only 18 months and the two of them will play a little together, but when she takes a nap, WOW, I am it! And, if I go check my email or something, he notices that I am not paying attention and finds something to utterly destroy. He needs to learn to play by himself, but I think his situation is going to make it difficult for the blanket technique to work. I am in the process of trying to find playmates and other activities in the morning to wear him out so he will take a little nap in the afternoon when his baby sister is also taking a nap. It's a work in progress...

Oh, and one other thing, TELL your wife that you need a break on the weekend. There is nothing wrong with it, brother, you've earned it!

Good luck and welcome to the experience of a lifetime!!!

Al Daddyshome, Inc. - The National At-Home Dad Network

www.daddyshome.org

Hey everyone,

Thanks for all the ideas. The wife goes back to work today from one of her days off. so I look forward to giving some of these ideas a try. Gonna have to put any ideas that involve money off tho, we're broke. lol but I will keep them in mind for when we get some extra cash. I look forward to hearing more ideas.

Thanks again

My wife works days and I watch my 21 month old girl till 5 p.m., and then go to work till 10:30 p.m.  When my wife has a day off, she is on duty with our daughter so that regular household chores can get done (mowing, painting, etc).  When there is no other option such as a baby sitter, but parents have to step up and realize there is no such thing as a day off (at least for now).  Its part of being a parent.

I am in a situation where i am the only one at hoem.  I work part-time and have allot more time than my wife.. I too am snapping at my wife when she comes home because I've had a hectic day.  It gets worse when I have to take care of business or so the job of someone else.  I am a new father.  My son is only 2 1/2 months old and demands allot of attention.  My wife also semands attention and has to deal with going back to work and school work at her apprenticeship.  She just not have any time.  I had to give up going to school to stay with my son which I am having another issue with, but someone has to be there.  It is a fathers job top man up and take up the slack.  It is also ther wife's job to help.  This is why there are two parents and not just one servant.

Hang in there it will get better

with what free time I do have I volunteer with my local fire department and my local search and rescue team. A lot of what I do for both can be done at home when I do have the kids or when my wife is off(she works nights) I can run calls. I am not even saying you have to find a fire department in your area. It can be anything including your kids school, local Red Cross or at your church.