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I can really use some help

Jneedshelp
Posts: 1
 Joined: 2009-12-20
 Dad Points: 5

Hello fellow comrads in arms.

My name is Jeff and I have been a "stay at home Dad" for over six years.  I have two children, a Daughter and son.  My kids are both toddlers and currently live a court ordered 50/50 split with my wife and I.

Here is my story:  I will try to sum things up, so it goes like this.  I got married and about 2 years after the wedding my wife and I decide to have children.  She was in a better progressing job at the time, so we decided that I would be the care giver to our child and or future children.  Now recently, I catch my wife on social websites and hiding how she is in contact with other men.  I even catch her on the phone having inappropriate chat with one guy.  My catching her and her finding out that I have been checking up on her inappropriate actions caused her to pull out a restraining order on me so that she could get the upper hand in custody.  I have to leave the house early December and have not had a place to call my own since.  The retaining order was proven false in court and the judge awarded tempory joint custody until another hearing late this month.  I have a part-time only job that pays nothing.  My wife cut me off financially.  I have nothing at this time.  I'm lucky I have a brother letting me stay with him occasionally. 

I'm here asking for any verbal assistance to my problem.  I'm not asking for financial support, so don't get the wrong impression!  Any GREAT attorney's known, any other people in the same position?  Any local NC Dad's like to have play dates with kids??  

Let me hear from you....

 

Thanks!


‹ Eastern PA Dads Lots of news this week - Pew research spins off a lot of articles ›

Submitted by Jneedshelp on Mon, 01/18/2010 - 10:39am.

Ariel3618
Ariel3618's picture
Posts: 284
 Joined: 2008-10-13
 Dad Points: 505
Support

I have not been through your situation and therefore can't offer much advice but I hate it when fathers post important, life changing posts and no one seems to read them or offer advice.  So I just want you to know that there are dads who are reading this. I know this probably isn't what you're looking for but I want to let you know that there are dads (like me) who support and empathize with you.    I wish I could be more help and I'm sorry you're having to go through this.  Your concern only proves the type of father you are: a caring one who understands the need to stay involved (and deeply cares for) his children.

Have you checked to see if there are any fathers' rights hotlines in your area? 


Wed, 01/20/2010 - 11:38am

Baggioital
Baggioital's picture
Posts: 23
 Joined: 2008-12-31
 Dad Points: 60
Bravo

I agree with Ariel3618.  Its a shame that people use the legal system that way (restraining order)... that isnt the original intent of the law.  Hang in there.  Theres other out there in similar situations.  We all make our mistakes but theres no going back in time to do things differently.  Play the hand you've been dealt because your child will benefit from your doing so.  Wish you the best.  John


Sat, 01/30/2010 - 12:53pm

STLDADDY
Posts: 14
 Joined: 2010-01-19
 Dad Points: 14
Be the better parent

MeetUp.com could be of some help to you it offers alot of great groups and org's that could be helpfull and you can search in your area I wish as SAHD's we can all stick together and be as strong as the SAHM's groups but i guess with men some that i talk to anyway its hard for us to swallow our pride and ask for help or show that at times we can be weakened by events in our life that we dont understand with that being said as hard as it may be to stay cool about this you have to make sure you keep this ALL ABOUT THE KIDS!!!!right now they cant decide for themselves who's the good parent or bad parent not saying it applies to you or her but we often loose focus of the big picture when life changing events happen THE KIDS!!Dont allow her actions to keep you from being a GREAT FATHER!!!!

I can be changed by what happens to me BUT I refuse to be reduced by it.

       DR. Maya Angelou                                                                        


Mon, 02/01/2010 - 9:54am

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