I have heard alot from mothers on how to disapline a child I even went to Love & Logic parenting classes but I would like to hear some from stay at home dads any opinions?
What forms of discipline are best?
Sometimes a warning, sometimes more
My children are really to old now for time outs but generally promising to not allow them to do something that they have wanted to do, or to take something away will work. Making sure you follow through on that promise is important or you give the impression that what ever it is they are being disaplined for can happen again.
Bob Boisvert SAHD since 2000 with Jennifer & Sarah (11 years) and Grace (7)
Take Away & Follow Through
When it happens, take a deep breath.
Calmly take away something they like.
If you make a threat, follow through.
Make sure the threat you make is one you can follow through on.
If a kid doesn't think you mean business, your threat means nothing.
In my 20 years as an at-home dad I never spanked or gave time outs to my kids.
When I did use a time out, I used it on myself.
I discovered that the calmer I acted the more cooperation I received from my kids.
That is not to say that I never raised my voice. There are times when I did but I didn't make it a habit.
The Pinch
I obviously try to redirect the behavior and then use time-outs. But, when they have crossed the line (and i'm sure you know what I mean by that ), I give them a good pinch on the bottom. In fact, that is what the topic of my blog today is on the Mom's site, Momaha.com. Find it at http://www.momaha.com/article/20100525/MOMS12/100529759/-1#al-watts-punishing-kids
Al Vice-President, Daddyshome, Inc. - The National At-Home Dad Network www.daddyshome.org
Ruready60 I would say that
Ruready60 I would say that the best way is the way that both parents agree upon. If you can't for some reason agree upon a certain one then try both ways and see which one works the best for the child. I myself was raised a airforce bratt and we new when our father ment business. I have a 3 year old and i have to say that the 123 count works for him. This is because if i get to 3 he knows he gets a good old swat on his behind. Its very imporant that this is done with out angur or frustation. The child being this young is not a threat to you but himself. When a child is told to stop it is very important that he do.es what you say for his saftey. If he runs out into a road and gets hit by a car these lesson may have saved his life if taught eary enough. Time outs are good but I dont know if a child at 3 if they are server enough. You know 123 works for me it may not for you but both parents need to be in this. The main care giver really is the one that must be the one that hands these out most so you find out what works and let your spouse know whats working and whats not. Its very important that you both agree so there is no misunderstanding though. Good Luck and God Bless
Don't use physical punishment
Well, here in Norway all forms of physical punishment of children are prohibited by law. There are innumerable reasons why not to discipline your kids physically. Here is a site that is a pretty good resource if you are wondering what the big deal is with a little spanking.
http://www.naturalchild.org/jan_hunt/tenreasons.html
Disciplining kids is a very touchy issue, with no perfect answer. When you say you disagree with someone on their parental approach, it is often interpreted as direct criticism of their parenting abilities. I hope no one gets too offended, but I hope that everyone will think twice about using physical punishment to discipline their kids.
I oould probably count the
I oould probably count the numbder of times I've spanked my kids on both hands and it's usually used as a second level punishment, meaning that they've already done a time alone within the past hour. We do things in a 3step phase.
On most occasions I'll count to 3 while waiting for them to stop an offense. But we also have a stop light with name tags that we use to show which level they are at during the day. If the wind up on yellow, I'll count quicker or they might go directly to time alone depending onthe offense. (If they blatantly break one of the printed house rules or hit each other). After which they move thier clip to red at which point they will usually do a double length time alone and lose a priveledge (mostly tv time but sometimes a toy)
MY biggest thing about punishment is what comes after. I'll kneel or sit on the floor with them, coming down to their eye to eye level and well have a quick talk about the offense and make sure they know why they were punished. I'll usually tell them that I love them but was dissapointed in thier behavior. Then they are required to appologise to the person they offensed
Discipline
I have twin 3 yo's (boy, girl) and 5 yo daughter. With them, I basically use these methods (keep in mind, each child will respond to certain disciplines over others and rarely it's the same as their sibling): I cut off tv, take away their favorite toy, put them in their bed for a time out, or every now and then a good thumping (taking one finger and letting it him them on the shoulder or head - not enough to hurt them, but to get their attention)....
Joined: 2010-05-21
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