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fighting vs. refereeing

Peer200x
Peer200x's picture
Posts: 33
 Joined: 2009-07-09
 Dad Points: 78

I have twin girls 19mos, they often fight, and argue with each other.  What have other twin parrents attended to this?  I have been seaching for options.  I do not want to referree every single arguement and small brawl.  However, if i hear that the best thing to do is intervene as much as possible and constantly reinforce them to be nice and not fight will do that.

One typical example of a typical brawl is one will have a toy or book and the bigger one will commonly come over and take what ever she wants.  The smaller girl then gets very mad and throws a fit.  I have tried reasoning, taking the toy away entirely, and telling the smaller (stronger) one to take it back...

Any insight would be greatly appreciated!


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Submitted by Peer200x on Sun, 06/13/2010 - 12:50pm.

TopDog
Posts: 176
 Joined: 2010-02-11
 Dad Points: 188
Take It Away to a Place they can See

Have a place where they can't get it.  You are the referee.  Anytime they fight over a toy they both lose.    You take it, and they get it back when they are nice to each other.  They will learn over time that it is better to share than consistently lose their toys as they don't play nice. Make sure that the place is high, and they can see the toy up there.   Let them lose the toy for a while, or a day, and maybe you forget about it for a few days.  Then a few days later, you remember, and they get it back. Dads can be very forgetful about the toys they take a way if the kids fight over the toy.


Sun, 06/13/2010 - 8:31pm

Peer200x
Peer200x's picture
Posts: 33
 Joined: 2009-07-09
 Dad Points: 78
awesome idea!

Thanks so much, I will start asap!  This brings new hope!


Mon, 06/14/2010 - 2:05pm

TopDog
Posts: 176
 Joined: 2010-02-11
 Dad Points: 188
The Bigger the Brawl, the longer Dad forgets the toy

You have to regulate it.  It the toy goes up there they need to lose a day looking at it.  As the fight gets worse the toy may stay up there an awful long time, in addition to the time you forget about it. 


Mon, 06/14/2010 - 4:25pm

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